PARENTING SKILLS FOR INFANTS II

Parenting Abilites for Infants

7 mejores para bebés presents the second part of this interesting article about some of the several PARENTING SKILLS FOR INFANTS, that all parents must apply to the complete and healthy development of their children.

If you want to read the first part, before continue with this second one make click at Parenting Skills for Infants I .

Control your Anger, Don’t let it Control You

Anger can be a paralyzing and debilitating condition.  But it can be a terrifying and degrading experience for your child if you’re taking your anger out on them.  Physical and verbal abuse of a child can have lasting and lethal implications, so it’s crucial that as a parent, you do whatever necessary to get your anger in check.

As a parent, you have a wonderful opportunity to undo the wrongs that were done to you as a child if you had an angry and abusive parent or parents. It can be very curative and demonstrate you where your troubles lie are and inspire you to fix them. Perhaps your past is filled with unresolved hurt and anger.  If so, take the necessary steps to heal yourself.  If you don’t, you could unwillingly and unthinkingly harm your child. Studies have shown that children whose mothers often express anger are more likely to be difficult to discipline.  Identify problems from your past and honestly look at current situations that are angering you. Maybe you aren’t fulfilled at work; perhaps your spouse and you are having relationship troubles, maybe you have other personal issues or unfulfilled goals that are bothering you. If all your child ever sees is your angry face and hears an angry voice, that’s what they’ll most likely grow into as well.

It’s important to ‘pick your battles’ when parenting. Accidents and nuisances don’t warrant the energy and agony it takes to get angry.  But misbehaviors such as a child hurting themselves, others or property demand a firm, quick and appropriate response from you. You will probably have to continually remind yourself that the small stuff isn’t worth getting worked up over. And remind yourself also that you’re the one in control of your anger; don’t let your anger control you.  Put yourself in time out, take a deep breath, walk away, do whatever you have to in order to get a grip on yourself before addressing the situation if you feel your anger coming on strong. Work hard onto this PARENTING SKILLS FOR INFANTS.

Do As I Say and As I Do

Children learn to imitate at a very young age.  It’s how they learn to behave, care for themselves, develop new skills, and communicate with others. From their earliest moments they watch you closely and pattern their own behavior and beliefs after yours. Your examples become permanent images, which will shape their attitudes and actions for the rest of their life.

It’s important to be responsible, consistent and loving with your child.  This also holds true for the relationship you have with your spouse, your parents, and other family members and friends that are also a part of your child’s life.  Own up to mistakes when you make them, and communicate open and honestly with all family members. 

It’s also important to take good care of yourself.  When we’re focusing on what’s best for our child it’s easy to neglect our own needs.  Your child and your family are counting on you physically and emotionally, so it’s imperative that you teach your child by example that taking care of yourself helps you to take care of them and the rest of your family. 

This shows your child that not only do you love them and the rest of the family, but you love yourself as well.  It is an important step in teaching your child about self esteem. 

This may involve getting a sitter and treating yourself out to dinner and a movie, or doing another favorite activity on your own.  It teaches your child that you are not only their parent, but your own person with your interests and needs, and also gives them a chance to show you how well they can do without you with them for a while.

It’s also important to nurture your relationship with your spouse.  Let your child see you communicate in a positive and healthy manner with one another, and show love and affection for one another so your child can begin to learn early on what a healthy marriage should be like. 

You’ll soon see your child patterning many of his behaviors after your own.  So make sure that what you say and do around your child will help build a strong sense of security and self esteem.

Encourage your Child to Feel Important              

It’s imperative for a child’s healthy development to feel important and worthy.  Healthy self-esteem is a child’s armor against the challenges of the world. Kids who feel good about themselves seem to have an easier time handling conflicts and resisting negative pressures.

They tend to smile more readily and enjoy life. These kids are realistic and generally optimistic.  It’s also been shown that children who feel important are well-rounded, respectful, and excel in academics, extracurricular activities and hobbies and develop healthy relationships with their peers. 

In contrast, for children who do not feel important or cherished have low self-esteem, and challenges can become sources of major anxiety and frustration. Children who think poorly of themselves have a hard time finding solving problems, and may become passive, withdrawn, or depressed.

You are the biggest influence in your child feeling important, valued and worthy.  Remember to praise your child for a job well done, and also for putting for a valiant effort.  Praise the good traits they naturally possess, and help them find ways to learn from their mistakes and failures.  Be honest and sincere in your praise. 

Help them realize that you also suffer from self doubt and can make mistakes from time to time, but that you know that you are important, valued and loved.  When you nurture your own self -esteem and importance, your child will learn to do the same, so be sure to lead by example and steer clear of self-depreciating yourself or engaging in activities that lower your self-worth or importance. 

Your child may have inaccurate or irrational beliefs about themselves, their abilities or their traits.  Accentuate the positive about your child, and encourage your child to set realistic expectations and standards for themselves. 

Help them identify traits or skills they’d like to improve and help them come up with a game plan for accomplishing that goal. Encourage your child to become involved in cooperative activities that foster a sense of teamwork and accomplishment.

Through these and other positive, affirming activities, your child is sure to develop a strong sense of self importance, value and worth which will carry into their adult years.

Focus on this important PARENTING SKILLS FOR INFANTS

Encouraging Play Encourages a Child’s Development

We’ve all heard the term, «Oh, that’s child’s play.» It implies something is easy, frivolous and unimportant in the overall scheme of things.  But to a child, child’s play is essential to their mental, social, emotional, and physical development. 

We all know that children like to play. But what we may not know is the importance of play in a child’s life. Play is essential to every area of a child’s growth and development.

Play provides a means for energy to be put to use. It strengthens and refines small and large motor skills, and it builds stamina and strength. Sensory learning develops mostly through play. Play is significant to physical development in that without it the body could not grow and develop normally.

Children possess a natural curiosity. They, explore, learn and make sense out of their environment by playing. Parents and educators alike can support this learning activity by ensuring age-appropriate toys, materials and environments are available to the child.

Play enables children to know things about the world and to discover information essential to learning. Through play children learn basic concepts such as colors, counting, how to build things, and how to solve problems. Thinking and reasoning skills are at work every time a child engages in some type of play.

Children learn to relate to one another, negotiate roles, share, and obey rules through play. They also learn how to belong to a group and how to be part of a team. A child obtains and retains friends through play.

Play fulfills many needs including a sense of accomplishment, successfully giving and receiving attention, and the need for self-esteem. It helps them develop a strong sense of self, and is emotionally satisfying to them.  They learn about fairness, and through pretending learn appropriate ways of expressing emotion such as anger, fear, frustration, stress and discover ways of dealing with these feelings.

So encourage your child’s play.  Color pictures, make finger paintings, build buildings and imaginary cities with blocks, and built a tent in the middle of the living room and go camping! And as we all know, childhood is fleeting, so let them enjoy being a kid while they are one!.

Expect Only the Best from Your Child

Expect the best from your child.  If you expect the best behavior and performance you’re your child, it’s often what you will get.  Children pick up on our beliefs about them, form a self-concept that matches that belief, and perform accordingly. If we expect them to be lazy, they’ll be lazy, which will confirm our expectations for them, and the cycle toward failure is started. If, on the other hand, we expect our kids to be successful, productive, creative, and responsible and honestly believe it to be true, then our children can’t help but rise to the occasion and confirm our best opinions of them with their positive actions. So expect nothing but the best from your children and watch them fulfill your expectations. 

Praise your child often when they perform a good deed or accomplish a new task.  Set simple, clear and consistent rules so your child knows exactly what is expected and the consequences of misbehaving or breaking the rules.

Maintain a consistent daily routine for your child as much as possible, and make sure your child gets lots of physical activity and time to play and socialize with their friends.  Encourage your child to learn how to make appropriate choices, and encourage your child to do things for themselves. Allow your child to talk about strong feelings, which will help them work through their anger and frustration. 

Above all, be a positive role model for your child, as their strongest educator is your example.  Take care of yourself, and expect the best from yourself.  Make appropriate choices and be firm yet fair when disciplining your child.

Make sure to spend lots of quality time with your child, and encourage them to become involved in activities that foster cooperation and a sense of accomplishment.  If you have great expectations of your child, you’ll be greatly pleased in the end.

Really important parenting skills for infants

Follow Through Is the Key to Successful Discipline                         

Let’s face it.  There are just some days when it would just seem easier to let your child have his way than feeling like you’re fighting a losing battle when trying to discipline them.  They beg, plead, cry, barter and scream – anything to get out of doing the time for their crime. 

However, don’t lose your strength and your will during this time.  It’s times like these when consistent disciplinary action is imperative to teaching your child positive and acceptable behaviors.  There is no room for negotiation when it comes to bad behaviors and there should be no room for exceptions when it comes time for punishing misdeeds or bad behavior. 

Hopefully before any misdeeds occur, you’ve sat down with your child and discussed the consequences of misdeeds and inappropriate behavior or decisions.  Be concise and consistent when discussing these consequences so that when the time to implement them comes, you can follow through with ease. 

Children are classically testing the boundaries and limits set on them on a continual basis, and the temptation to ‘bend the rules’ just once or twice can be overwhelming when they’re really trying your patience.  But be firm yet fair. 

Emphasize that this was the understood consequence for this particular misdeed or inappropriate action, and that now is not the time to negotiate.  Afterwards, take time out to discuss the situation with your child, and if it seems that perhaps a consequence that worked at first isn’t working anymore, rethink that punishment and negotiate with your child. 

Of course, parameters that are set for their well-being or safety should never be negotiated.  But in other instances, it may be time to develop a new consequence based on your child’s age, temperament or maturity level. 

It’s also imperative that your spouse and any other adult caregivers are all on the same page and following through on punishments with the same level of consistency and clarity.  Should you determine that what was once working isn’t working anymore and develop a new parameter, be sure all adult caregivers are brought into the loop so that follow through remains consistent and clear.

One really hard PARENTING SKILLS FOR INFANTS to daily work on.

Get Involved in your Child’s Activities, Hobbies and School

It’s probably no secret that children who have involved parents are more happy, healthy, and well-adjusted and excel at their educational and extracurricular pursuits. 

It can increase their cognitive development, keeps them motivated, strengthens the parent-child relationship, and has a direct positive influence on their overall academic achievement. 

In turn, it can also help parents achieve a positive outlook on their parenting, increase their own self confidence and self esteem, and will most likely feel more satisfied with their child’s educational experience at school.

But where do you get involved?   With today’s busy schedules between home, work, and school, it may feel that the average family has very little quality time to offer. 

However, different options and levels of commitment are available to fit every parent’s availability, and with some careful planning and dedication, you can make it a positive experience for both yourself and your child.

First of all, discover what your child is most passionate about.  Maybe you’ve thought about volunteering for the school bake sale to raise money, but your child is actually more actively involved in her local Girl Scouts troop.   If that’s the case, then get together with the other Girl Scout parents and see what you can contribute to help the troop.  Maybe you could organize a bake sale to benefit their next summer outing. 

It’s also important to consider what skills, talents and abilities you can bring to the table.  Maybe your child’s school is in desperate need of your help organizing a fundraiser, but your skills in sewing and designing might better serve the school if you were to help in making the costumes for the school play. 

Remember, you want this to be a positive experience for both of you, and if your child senses that you’re not happy with what you’ve chosen to become involved in, then they likely will not be happy as well. 

But the bottom line is get involved and stay involved.  Children of involved parents are less likely to get into mischief, have emotional problems, or have problems in school.  You benefit by connecting with and staying connected to your child.  It’s a win-win situation for you both.

Work hard on this Parenting Skills for Infants.

Handling Conflict about Rules Enforcement at Home

Some parents may worry that setting strict rules may distance them from their children.  But this simply isn’t the case.  Though they may gripe and complain and get upset when you become the enforcer, they realize deep down that this shows you care.  These parameters you set forth and enforce make your child feel loved, safe, and secure. 

It’s never easy developing and introducing rules. Parents may tend to avoid setting rules because they fear confrontation and unpleasantness. But the uncomfortable stuff isn’t necessarily a reflection on your relationship with your child, it’s just the nature of adolescence – breaking rules and pushing limits is a part of growing up.  We tend to want to be our child’s friend sometimes, and when we’re laying down the law that just isn’t possible.  Our primary role is to protect, nurture and provide for our children. 

When kids break rules, parents often overreact with harsh, disproportionate and unenforceable punishment, which undermines the effectiveness of setting rules. Instead, when you first tell your child about a new rule, discuss the consequences of breaking that rule – what the punishment will be and how it will be carried out.

Consequences must go hand in hand with limits so that your child knows what the cost of breaking the rules will be. The punishments you set should be reasonable and related to the violation. For example, if you catch your son and his friends smoking, you might «ground» him by restricting his social activities for two weeks.

Punishments should only involve penalties you discussed before the rule was broken. Also, never issue empty threats. It’s understandable that you’ll be angry when house rules are broken, and sharing your feelings of anger, disappointment, or sadness can have a powerfully motivating effect on your child.

Since we’re all more inclined to say things we don’t mean when we’re upset, it’s sometimes best to give ourselves a time-out period to cool off before we say something we don’t mean.

Make the ground rules crystal clear to your child.  It’s imperative that you are consistent and follow through with a defined disciplinary action after each infraction, and that your child understands the reasons why.      

One tough Parenting Skills for Infants to accomplish.

Harsh Discipline: Does it do More Harm than Good?

Recent studies suggest that low-income parents tend to endorse much harsher discipline, partially because they hold stronger beliefs about the value of spanking and experience higher levels of stress.

However, parents who work in high-stress jobs or are stay-at-home parents who are feeling frustrated or isolated are also at risk.  It’s imperative that parents recognize their tendency to punish a child too severely and take the needed steps to make sure the punishment is appropriate for their child’s age, temperament and maturity level. 

The study’s finding showed that parents from lower income levels or work high pressure jobs are more stressed, and they react more emotionally to their child’s behavior, and thus use harsher discipline. A parent in this situation may benefit from outside assistance and learning about alternative disciplinary strategies that are more appropriate and less harsh. 

It’s also important for a parent to realize that children thrive on praise.  Parents in such a situation may always jump to discipline but fail to praise their child for their good deeds, behaviors and traits. 

Children instinctively want to please their parents and make them proud.  By encouraging positive behavior, the parent will most likely discourage the behavior that has driven them in the past to punish too harshly. 

In order to encourage positive behavior deserving of praise, parents might want to consider giving their child a task they know they’re able to accomplish, and praise their efforts along the way. 

Parents need to also consistently praise their children for the positive traits they possess.  Their child might be good at math in school, helpful to their little brother or sister, or is good at drawing pictures. 

Praise these good traits and the child is likely to respond by acting appropriately and behaving positively in order to gain more praise.

In the end, it’s important to remember that a child is just that – a child.  A parent should make a concerted effort to make sure the discipline is appropriate and take care of themselves physically, mentally and emotionally so they can optimally provide for their child’s physical and emotional well-being. 

Help your Child Kick the Thumb Sucking Habit

Thumb sucking is a concern many parents have. Toddlers suck their thumbs because it’s comforting and calming. It’s probably something they did before they were born and revert back to it when they are nervous, agitated, scared or ill.  They may also use it to lull themselves back to sleep in the middle of the night.

Parents shouldn’t concern themselves unless it continues after the age their permanent teeth begin to appear, around six years old. Experts say that it’s the intensity of the thumb sucking and the tongue’s thrust that deforms teeth and makes braces necessary later.

Children who rest their thumb passively in their mouth are less likely to have difficulty than children who suck aggressively. If you’re concerned, closely monitor your child and analyze his technique. If they appears to be sucking vigorously, you may want to begin curbing their habit earlier.

Punishing or nagging your child to stop won’t help because it’s usually an automatic response. Attempting to curb it by putting an elastic bandage on his thumb or another method will seem like unjust punishment, especially since they indulge in the habit for comfort and security.

Try to wait it out. Children usually give up thumb-sucking when they’ve found other ways to calm and comfort themselves. Consider offering them other alternatives to comfort themselves such as a soft blanket or lullaby toy

The key is to notice when and where they are likely to suck their thumbs and offer an alternative.  If it happens while they are tired, try giving more naps.  If they suck their thumb frequently while watching television, try to distract them with a toy that will keep their hands occupied. 

Older children may need gentle reminders to curtail thumb sucking while in public, and praise should be given freely when the child finds and uses an acceptable alternative.  Your child’s pediatric dentist can offer other suggestions for helping your child kick the thumb sucking habit.

Hobbies are Healthy

Hobbies benefit children in many ways. It gives a child an opportunity to express themselves, and it allows them to discover themselves and build self-esteem. They are also great educational tools.

A child interested in rock collecting learns about geology and science, and a child in writing stories learns about sentence structure and proper grammar. Hobbies teach children to set and achieve goals, solve problems and make decisions.  They can also set the course for what your child becomes later in life as they often turn into lifelong interests or careers. 

Children who have hobbies are usually following in their parents footsteps, so set a good example by pursuing your own hobby.  Your child will need space for their hobby, so find an area designated specifically for his hobby so he can work on it. Realize that hobbies can sometimes be quite messy, so be at the ready for messes as they come with the territory.

Be available to your child to provide guidance, support and encouragement.  This is a great time to teach your child strong work habits, such as following directions closely, setting goals, and proper planning and organization.  Show them that nothing worthwhile is ever easy, especially when they begin to become frustrated with their progress. 

It’s also a good time to teach them about personal responsibility and show them how important it is to properly care for their work area and their ‘tools of the trade.’

Children will be more encouraged to work on their hobbies if activities like watching television or playing video games are limited.  It’s been noted by experts that by age 15, the average child has spent more time watching television than sitting in a classroom. 

Again, here’s where setting a good example is crucial.  Instead of watching that four-hour football game on Saturday, turn the TV off and work on your own hobby.  Your child may want to join in or work on their own as a result.

Hobbies are rewarding and enriching parts of our lives, so encourage your child to explore his own interests and find a hobby of their very own.

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Parenting Skills for Infants

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